The church was holding baptisms during the service, so they brought in a large tub. As the sermon continued, a boy near the front stared at the tub. He nudged his father. The father turned and the boy whispered, “Where did they get such a big bucket for the leaking roof?” 😫😆😂🤭

A pastor received a letter from a congregant. When he removed the letter from the envelope, it had one word written on it- “Fool”! “Well”, said the pastor, “the sender signed. 🤣😂😫

🌸Laughing in heaven🌸 How can you make God laugh? Tell him your plans. 😫🤣😬

MY NEWSPAPER WAS DIFFERENT A customer walked into my clothing shop and asked to see the pants that were advertised in the paper that day. “We don’t have an ad in the paper today,” I told her. She insisted I was wrong, so I got a copy of the paper, and we went through it, eventually landing on an ad for pants from another local store. Exasperated, the customer glared at me and said, “In my newspaper, the ad was for this store!” 🤣😆😆

What did the duck say when she bought lipstick? Put it on my bill. 💋 🤣😂🤩🤪

💰Quarters from Heaven💰 My husband, Tim, and I were headed to our car after a delicious steak dinner when the subject of Grandpa George came up. Tim’s beloved grandfather had enjoyed nothing more than a good steak. And a good practical joke. “Whenever my grandma scolded me, Grandpa George would stand behind her and make funny faces,” Tim said. “One time he told me tuna made the best bait. So the next time we went fishing, he tied a can of tuna to the line!” I couldn’t help but laugh.🤣😆 “I wish I’d known him,” I said. “When did he pass away?” Tim scratched his head. “How could you forget that?” I teased. “Your own grandfather!” “Well, let’s see,” Tim said. “It was either 1969 or 1970….” PING! I glanced down. A quarter had fallen at our feet. No one else was near us in the parking lot. Where in the world had it come from? Tim picked it up. “Minted in 1970,” he said. Tim paused, then cracked up. “It was 1970,” he said, looking up at the sky with a big grin. “Thanks, Grandpa George!” 😆🤣🤪😫🫢

What did the mommy spider say to the Baby spider? You spend too much time on the web. 😩😆🤣🫢

What warm drink helps mom relax on Mother’s Day? Calm-omile tea. 🫢🤣😆

The beauty of a joke is that it can be used to make others forget their problems.” “If only for a moment.”

Who could ever find a trip to the doctor’s a pleasurable one? Starting with that eerie silence in the hallways, some moans and groans behind closed doors and that trailing smell of formaldehyde, everything about a visit to the doctor is at least a tiny bit unsettling. And there aren’t any games in the waiting room anymore, and they don’t even give you a lolly for holding in your tears during an exam! And surely, even if you are waiting for something almost pleasant like having your ears cleaned you still feel a bit nervous and grab your phone for a distraction. And, if regular scrolling just doesn’t cut it anymore, we have prepared something much better Here we go!

I’ve never vaccinated any of my kids. I just pay the pediatrician to do it. 😩

What did the colonists wear to the Boston Tea Party? Tea-shirts. 😩🎉👚😂

What does the Statue of Liberty stand for? It can’t sit down. 😩😂🪑