😩🤣🤭Humor’s Healing POWER😩😂🫢
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Posts
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July 10, 2024 at 8:23 pm
I should have never glued a piranha to my boomerang. I just know it’s going to come back to bite me. 🫦😆😂😩
July 10, 2024 at 8:24 pmI saw a lion get in to a hot air balloon basket. It caused quite an uproar. 😂😩🤭
July 10, 2024 at 8:24 pmI always get frustrated trying to put my trousers in the wardrobe. I think I have hanger management issues. 😂😩🤭😆
July 10, 2024 at 8:25 pmMy credit card company sent me a camouflaged bull. It’s the hidden charges you have to watch out for. 🐂📈😩😂🤭
July 10, 2024 at 8:26 pmC, E-flat and G walk into a bar. “Sorry,” said the bartender, “We don’t serve minors here.” 😩😂🤭😆
July 10, 2024 at 8:27 pmI saw an opera about a rodent that goes round letting the air out of tyres. Deflator Mouse. 🐁😂😩🤭😆
July 10, 2024 at 8:27 pmWhat do you call weightlifting vegetables? Muscle sprouts. 😂😆😩🤭
July 10, 2024 at 8:28 pmI’m not saying I’m old. I’m just saying that my dinner time and my bed time are getting dangerously close to each other. 👵😩🤭😂😆
July 10, 2024 at 8:29 pmI’m looking for ways to keep my thumbs warm in fingerless gloves. Any tips? 😆😂😩
July 10, 2024 at 8:29 pmThe doctor asked me how long I’d had amnesia. I said, “For as long as I can remember.” 😩😂🤭
July 10, 2024 at 8:30 pmI got into an accident and I was surprised when the doctor handed me a report saying that my fingers were all broken. The news was hard for me to grasp. 😩😂😆🤸♂️🏋️🏃♂️
July 10, 2024 at 8:30 pmWhat do you call a moose with no name? Anonymoose. 😩😂🤭😆
July 10, 2024 at 9:29 pmI’m writing a song about getting my door lock replaced. There’s a key change at the end. 🤭😩😂
July 10, 2024 at 9:30 pmI bought some oats for my horse but returned them because they were poor quality. The manager took my feedback. 🤣🥸😂😩
July 10, 2024 at 9:31 pmA friend of mine hurt himself trying to jump over a wall whilst dressed as a clown. It was his own stupid vault. 🤡😩😂🤭🤣
July 10, 2024 at 9:32 pmWhy don’t you see many tortoises wearing scarves? They have turtlenecks. 🐢😩😂🤣
July 10, 2024 at 9:32 pmI used to wonder who flipped a vampire’s pancakes. Turns out it’s Count Spatula. 😂😩🤣😆
July 10, 2024 at 9:33 pmI tried doing 100 sit-ups but I didn’t finish. My stomach couldn’t handle that kind of ab use. 💪🤸♀️🤸🤸♂️🏋🏽♂️😩😂
July 10, 2024 at 9:33 pmMy advice to anyone wanting to climb the mountains between France and Spain: You will need strong legs and a good Pyrenees. 😂😩🤣😆
July 10, 2024 at 9:34 pmI swapped my boat for a new ship I hadn’t seen before. I thought it was worth a punt. 😁😆😂
July 10, 2024 at 9:34 pmI like to put coriander on my blended tomatoes. It’s soup herb. 😩😂
July 10, 2024 at 9:35 pmWhat do you call a pair of inspirational shoes? Motivational sneakers. Bwahahahahaha!!!!!
July 12, 2024 at 5:06 pmJesus was walking around Heaven one day. In a small, secluded garden He saw an old man, crying. Alarmed, Jesus ran up to him and said, “Hey, now, what’s all this? This is paradise. There should be no tears or sorrow.” The old man wiped away his tears and said, “Oh, I know. I’m sorry. But… well, many years ago, a son came to me through… well, let’s say ‘mysterious circumstances’. After many trials he went through a miraculous transformation, and a book was written about him that became known the world over. I thought I would find him here, but I haven’t. I’m afraid I’ll never see him again.” Wide-eyed, Jesus looked at the man and said, “Wait a minute… You weren’t, by any chance… a carpenter, were you?” The man looked up in surprise. “Why, yes. Yes, I was!” Jesus burst into tears of joy and held out His arms saying, “Father!” The man cocked his head doubtfully and said, “Pinocchio???” 😩😂🤣🤭
July 12, 2024 at 5:56 pmTwo sisters inherit the family ranch. Unfortunately, after just a few years, they are in financial trouble. In order to keep the bank from repossessing the ranch, they need to purchase a bull from the stockyard in a far town so that they can breed their own stock. They only have $600 available. The older sister says, “I’m going to take the bus to the stockyards since you need the pick-up truck. When I get there, if I decide to buy a bull, I’ll contact you to bring the pickup truck and trailer and haul it home.” The older sister arrives at the stockyard, inspects a bull, and decides she wants to buy it. The man tells her that he will sell it for $599, no less. After paying him, she makes her way to the nearest town to send her sister a telegram telling her the news. She walks into the telegraph office and says, “I want to send a telegram to my sister, telling her that I’ve bought a bull for our ranch. I need her to hitch the trailer to our pickup truck and drive out here so we can haul it home.” The telegraph operator said he’ll be glad to help her, then adds, “It’s 99 cents a word.” Well, after paying for the bull, she only had one dollar, enough to send one word. After a few minutes of thinking, she nods and says, “I want you to send her this word: comfortable.” The operator shakes his head. ‘How is she ever going to know that you want her to hitch the trailer to the pickup truck and drive out here to haul that bull back to your ranch if you send her just the word “comfortable?” She explained, “This is a big word for my sister. So she’ll read it very slowly … sounding it out as com-for-da-bull.” 😩😂🤭
July 12, 2024 at 8:08 pmWhat happens to an illegally parked frog? It gets toad away! 😩😂🤭
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